It’s been awhile since my last post, nearly two months in fact, but I’m finally back again. The summer holidays are well and truly started now and I’m juggling work, kids, keeping peace, housework and gardening. At the moment I’m having a nice ‘lunch break’ while the kids play cards together (without fighting!) I was perusing Yahoo news when I happened across two very disturbing stories. One came from China where a mother refused to allow firefighters to break into her BMW to save her son who had been locked inside on a dangerously hot day. She claimed she didn’t want her expensive car to be damaged and wanted to wait for a locksmith rather than have the rescue team save her son quickly. The second story came from the UK and involved a security guard deciding a mother could not breastfeed her 9 month old daughter in public so ordered her to leave the store. After the mother refused the IDIOT security guard snatched the little girl from her mother – while she was still feeding – and basically held her for ransom to make the mother leave. WHAT is WRONG with people?!!
I remember when my children were small, especially with my daughter who was my first, the general public took it upon themselves to tell me how to look after my child. It drove me bats**t crazy! One psycho physically removed my daughters thumb from her mouth while we stood on a subway train telling me it was bad for her to do that. That person is lucky to have walked off the subway with working legs! Sometimes things happen that, while in the moment, leave us so dumbfounded that the reaction isn’t there and it’s only later the anger and humiliation come flowing through. But I learnt quickly to be on the lookout for those special individuals and be at the ready to let ’em have it! The funny part about this is that usually the people doing the ‘disciplining’ are not parents themselves; those with kids know better than to step on another parent’s shoes.
The flip side of this thought is that parents are also very good at picking up bad parenting behaviours and will, sometimes without provocation, have no qualms about sharing their views! I’m guilty of this – call me judgemental – and for sure people look at me and think the same. A pet peeve of mine is seeing very young kids being dragged to a restaurant and having to endure a very long and boring evening while their parents let their hair down a bit too long, get gazeboed and pretend their children don’t exist. It’s as if they forget they are parents and shut out the sounds of their screaming infant who desperately wants a feed. If you’re going to do that either a)get a babysitter or b) party at home! Another example, in my view, of questinable parenting is allowing yourself to be guided by an app or book or (the worst of the worst) a celebrity. In my mind you need to learn from your child; no-one can tell you exactly how your child will behave, eat, sleep so to be made to believe you could be wrong because your child does not conform to a certain ‘rule’ is mental. Look up from your tablet/book/screen and at your child. Learn its habits, work with them and you’ll find a way to make life easier on yourself and ensure you are confident in your parenting abilities.
Parenting is a funny business and no-one is absolutely right on how it should be but some ground rules should apply – Yes, rip your car apart if it will save your child from dying within a sweltering car. Yes, allow a mother who has 9 month old twins to breastfeed with dignity while in a shop. No, do NOT assume you can tell a parent how to do their job, just assume they know what they are doing and if it looks detrimental to the child’s health then sure, step in! My rules are more relaxed than others and my kids have amazing personalities and funny little quirks which I know and love.
I’ve just realized my 4 year old son is playing his sisters Hello Kitty Manicure game on the iPad…oh well – anything for peace, right?!!